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Posts Tagged ‘positive’

I read this poem some years ago written by Khalil Gibran from Lebanon. I liked it as it had something different to say. Here’ an extract from the poem:

Your thought urges you to marry wealth and notability. Mine commands self-reliance. Your thought advocates fame and show, mine cousels me and implores me to cast aside notoriety and treat it like a grain of sand cast upon the shore of etnernity. You thought instills in your heart arrogance and superiority. Mine plants within me love for peace and the desire for independence. Your thought begets dreams of palaces with furniture of sandalwood studded with jewels and beds made of twisted silk threads. My thoughts speak softly in my ears: ‘Be clean of body and spirit even if you have nowhere to lay your head.’ Your thought makes you aspire to tittles and offices. Mine exhorts me to humble services. You have your thought and I have mine.

Najma Aijaz, 25th April 2012

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The main reason why I always wanted to leave Pakistan was that I didn’t like the way daily life moved. In Fact, I was trying to find excuses to speak bad things. I was a famous unpatriotic person among my friends. I used to get annoyed by the honking bikes and polluted traffic.

I remember clearly that I never thought for a single moment to improve things, at least to keep a positive attitude and optimistic approach towards things. All I did was I ran away. 

Today I realize that the efforts that I put and the money that I spent in order to get aboard and leave the country; If I could just spend a half of it over making something better, I would have been something. At least I would have been able to visualize the future, which I can’t see it here in Kuala Lumpur.

It’s been 64 years since Pakistan got freedom. Wait a minute: What is Freedom? I don’t know. They never taught me in school. All I remember from school is that Pakistan was freed by Jinnah on 14th August 1947 from The Great Britain via dialogues.

So what is freedom? When Pakistan was a part of India, still things would’ve been the same. People with families trying to find work to feed them. Parents would be thinking about their children’s future and education.

Ambitious people would have been running after money, sex and fame. People would hardy get the justice out of the government offices unless they have certain sources. Scared of political and racist activities with in the towns. The Mothers would send their children to the schools like they send young men for war, hoping for their safe return. So where are we now? What we have lost and achieved in the 64 years? Freedom?

Dictionary defines Freedom as the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint. These words seem quite simple but holds massive power and importance. It is human psychology that we always realize the importance of something once we lose it.

Every family has a black sheep you would never realize the importance of something if you haven’t seen the opposite. I have not experienced but seen, the captivity and hence I realize the importance of Freedom. It really brings hell of feelings in my mind when A police officer on a road block stops me and asks me” What are you doing in my country”? Or when a proud citizen yells out that” This is My country and I would do what I want”.

This is when I realized how free we used to be; the freedom of making choices. See your friends whenever you want to, stay late night out and no one would ask a question. No police officer will question about your appearance in that country, for, that is your home, the paradise within. The country is our body, and if any part of our body is aching, we don’t cut it, we work on it, try to improve it and bring it back to music. The fact is, I think, that we are too busy in criticizing our country’s problems that we have lost the notion of thinking it optimistically to make things better. If the system is corrupt, let it me. But corruption doesn’t work officially. You are citizen, you have the rights. You should know the rights and you should use them.

I’m the active user of Facebook and I have seen many people/pages that post mainly the pictures which exposes the bad side of the country. And I feel sad and sorry. Why don’t they post the good things to show the worlds how good we are or how good we want to be. Yesterday tells us that the nation it used to be, but today and tomorrow, this is what matters. We can make it happen. The tomorrow might be ours. Miracles do happen and we have ability to make one happen.

The security concerns might be an issue but when your emotional self is satisfied and like hell we care about anything else. Besides that you are close to your family and your traditions and cultures. You are surrounded by the people who look alike you and you have the liberty of expressing your emotions in your own language.

So now this comes with the technology and modern things. So tell me, Should I not love Pakistan because it doesn’t have metro train systems, huge shopping malls and branded coffee shops? That’s not enough reason not to love your nation. Let’s, for instance, look at education. I am enrolled in one of the leading industries of this country, Hotel Management.

I don’t say I’m super talented and hard-working student but I don’t find any competition. Most of the times I tell my teachers what to do. I rather felt sad when I was the only student in my first semester to pass my exams out ta 23 students. I wish badly that I could have invested my money in any of the leading Alma mater of Pakistan, such as CBM or SZABIST. I could have some competition and luxury of being taught by the quality and highly qualified teachers rather than high school graduates. 

Most of the people say Pakistan doesn’t have the opportunities but that is not true. Where there is will there is a way. I would put it like this. If you have courage of doing things you do, no mater what circumstances be, or you become coward, and run away. After completion of my studies I wish to comeback and work in my own country and something tells me I’m going to do it hell lot more better that anywhere else in this world. 

First important tier of Islam is Touheed; which means “I believe in ALLAH the Exalted, in His Angels, His Scriptures, His Prophets, the Day of Judgement, and in the fact that every thing good or bad (in the world) is pre-destined by ALL resurrection after death.” Every Muslim in the world believes so. So the primary belief of Islam is not only to believe what you see but believe what you don’t see; Allah. This belief differentiates from other religions of the world. So the point is, Why don’t we keep such belief for our future; That, Allah has set up the destiny and you would never know what’s coming on your way. The question arises here in my mind that does Allah pre-destined the life and future of communities, cities, states and countries. The only answer that comes to my mind is that all those worldly things are run my man and faith ans self belief is what is going to take them to the finish point.

Awais Rehman,  A Hotelier

in Kuala Lampur

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My habit of reading started when I was about 10. My father used to bring Young Times, which was a weekly magazine for kids and teens. Then we subscribed to it and I used to get excited every Tuesday picking it up from my door mat. I remember I used to prefer reading stories that used to be published in YT rather than story books at my school library. During my teens many of my articles and poems were published in YT. One of the poems are even published at this blog, titled “A Silent Cry’. I once wrote an article after I got to know a student killed himself after he failed in his class. So I wrote about how students should have hope and dying isn’t really a way out. It was well appreciated by my English teacher, Mam Norma. (Due to reasons unknown (perhaps recession in 2009?) Young Times was stopped being published. I still miss it!)

Recently I read a post on the blog positiveprovocations.com about heart centered blogging. Since I too have started a blog I was interested as to what it’s writer, Zeenat, had to say. Overall what she meant was that instead of writing a blog mainly for the purpose of money we should focus on writing what interests us and then consider the financial part. Because if what we write comes from the heart, has to be interesting.

Her article gave me some kind of perspective about what I could write here. 

Since I have grown up reading magazines like Young Times, Young World (in Pakistan) , Campus Journal (used to be published by university students back in U.A.E.), Teens magazine (in Pakistan), Readers’  Digest etc, I still prefer reading magazines to books. I would also want to publish my own magazine someday. I haven’t really planned anything about it, though. I usually write when I feel like and when I am free because firstly I am an accountancy student so there are other deadlines to meet too.

Najma Aijaz, 5th March 2012 

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A very dear friend has guest posted for my blog.  She has recently created her own blog as well (address at the end). The following post may give you an idea about her style of writing.  🙂

ARE YOU BEING A GOOD EMPLOYEE TO ‘YOURSELF’?

“Oh well I don’t have the patience and time to cook my meals, so I order my food home most of the time. I have struggled with weight problems for a long time now.”

“I feel so low and gloomy lately, I don’t feel like doing anything”

“I have all this studying to do, so I don’t really have the time to socialize.”

“My ignorant boyfriend has being acting so indifferent lately; all I do whole day is try to get his attention and getting none is making me miserable!!”

“I wish I looked like her..she has the best of everything!”

“I hate myself!!!”

“Why do I always fail??”

“Why can’t I look like these size 0 models?? I hate being size 8!!”

“I can never be him..he is ‘The Man’ blessed with all the good looks and charm; and always has the luck when it comes to girls!”

“Nobody loves me..”

These are just very few common statements most of us make nowadays. If you analyze each statement, you can get a clear picture of that person’s self-image. How much positiveness do you observe, or is there any at all? Well to me, the word “Negativity” is flashing bright and big in my mind right now!

So what is one’s self-image? In short, we can define it as the way a person views themselves. But for a broader and deeper understanding of the term requires intense analysis of ones own self-image.

I believe self-image is a very complex mental picture, which is determined and influenced by various other self-qualities and factors, such as:

Self-Esteem , Self-Importance ,Self-Care, Self-Respect, Self-Affection / Self-Love, Self-confidence, Self-regard, Self-worth, Originality, Positivity, Beliefs, Emotions, Desires ,Equality.

A simple definition of a person’s self-image is their answer to this question – “What do you believe people think about you?” I have often observed poor self-image to be the result of accumulated criticisms that the person collected as a child and still do even to date, which have led to damaging his own view of themself.

Self-love is some thing I have seen very less around me. It always made me wonder why is it that people forget or is neglectful that he or she needs to be loved not just from others but most importantly from their own. As a result, he or she fails to realize how much impact it makes on ones self-image.

Throughout the years I have spent in medical school, I have realized that pampering yourself inside-out and keeping your soul happy, will naturally help attain a more beauteous outer look as well. And that a charming body language comes from steady balance between the inner and outer self-foundations and self-control of the mind.

Life’s stresses can wear you out easily, mentally and physically. But what do we really do to protect ourselves from these stresses and prevent detrimental effects on us?

  • Do we all eat right? Eat healthy?
  • Do we all take out time from our busy schedule to exercise?
  • Do we all have a social life?
  • Are we all capable of maintaining inner peace? If so, how well do we understand the imbalances in our inner peace and how to maintain it?
  • Do we all know how to balance between pleasures, desires, wants and needs?
  • How well do we manage negative emotions such as fear, anxiety, negativity, frustration and depression?
  • How original are we with our ideas?
  • Do our wants outweigh our needs?
  • Are we always happy with what we have and what we get?
  • Overall, do we all live a healthy lifestyle?

These few questions can get your mind thinking – am I really putting the effort to keep myself satisfied eternally? Now you may say that different people satisfy themselves by various things and ways, some emotionally, some psychologically, some spiritually and some physically. The list can go on from having a circle of friends, caring family, lovable spouse, career, ambitions, sports, charity, socializing, meditation, praying and many more, or just simply by keeping themselves busy. But do we all feel a sense of self-worth and self-importance at the end of the day after having these various satisfactions?

Self-image plays an important role in daily life. It can affect almost everything. The way one conduct him or her self in front of others, orally conveying of one’s self-thoughts, body language, opinions, decisions and even the way you think , can give an observer a precise picture of your self-image and if it’s a poor one, then its not really some thing that will make you very happy.

To conclude, following are a few strategies I used to help myself to improve my self-image.

  • Most importantly you do not need any one other than yourself, to firstly accept the way you are and who you are.
  • Love yourself. Respect yourself. Praise yourself.
  • Treat yourself often. You don’t need a partner to buy you a bunch of inexpensive flowers or to go watch a movie. Treat yourself at the best restaurant you have always wanted to go to but just not alone.
  • You do not need huge company for happiness.
  • Learn to appreciate the smallest to the biggest things in your life. So that if it’s gone one day, you shouldn’t have a hard time accepting life’s harsh truths.
  • Self-dependence is always good on the long run.
  • Don’t sit and wait for things to change. Make a move and be the change.
  • Do little things that make you happy or relaxed, from experimenting with your hair, to being a helping hand to someone, to been just a listener to somebody who just had a bad day, to even writing a letter to your parents appreciating all that they do for us
  • Do not depend on another for you own happiness or care.
  • Your beliefs affect your perceptions or how you interpret what you see, hear and feel. Look at yourself and identify the beliefs that are affecting your life in a negative manner. Knowing your beliefs will give you a sound basis for emotional freedom.
  • Feel your feelings. Do not muffle or bury emotions within yourself. Release them. How? Talk to someone you trust and who is a good listener. Crying – a very normal method to release your emotions. Another very helpful way is to simply keep a journal and write down your feelings and thoughts.
  • Healthy eating and exercising often is a key to long-lasting nurture of oneself. Physical fitness has affects not just on your body, but on your mind and soul as well.
  • It’s all about the little things in life that has a huge impact on nurturing of your self-image.

I must say that, in the past few years, I too had forgotten that I need to live not just for others or just for the sake of living, but for my own self and I realized that I needed affection and care not just from my loved ones, but from myself as well.

As the saying goes, no one person is perfect, but the one who learns from his mistakes and corrects themselves can always reach near perfect with time.

Human nature is not perfect and neither is the world we live in. With it comes suffering and the only path to end this suffering is by gradual self-improvement.  So are you being a good employee to “Yourself”?

Post written by:  NJDS . Blog:  http://memyselfyouusandi.blogspot.com 

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